Politics Nick Clegg, current leader of the Liberal Democrats writes what might be the most coherent article about the general state of modern politics I've ever read:

"A place where MPs vote on their own pay and expenses. Where backbenchers can wait on the green benches for up to six hours, just to make a three-minute speech. Woe betide anyone who ventures to the loo: they're liable to lose the chance of speaking at all. There are different coloured carpets to tell you what part of the building you're in. Different people with different coloured badges are allowed on different parts of the river terrace according to what time of year it is. A place, in short, from another age."
Of course, as a Lib Dem I'm biased, but this is a fluid piece of text I'd urge anyone to read. The actual business of government these days seems to be done by civil servants whilst people in the chamber spend their days point scoring and trying (and usually failing) not to look like an idiot. [via]

TV Trust Damon to come up with something this pithy and funny about the Doctor Who change over...

"Oh lordy! I've just had a thought. Is this going to be like the change over between Blair and Brown? Are we going to find out in some hastily published memoirs that Moffat's been jangling the TARDIS keys over Davies' head for the past few years? Will we find out that Davies' wife fell pregnant during a stop over at the annual Balmoral Who Convention because they forgot the sonic contraception equipment? Will we find out that Chibnall was bulimic all through his tenure in charge of Torchwood..."
I actually choked on my toast this morning when I read that. Genius.

"Ten and a five please."



Life Anyone else of a certain age from Liverpool looking at this little slip of paper and feeling the weight of years? I found this bus ticket pretending to be a book mark in an old encyclopaedia earlier today and was immediately taken back to the early eighties when bus drivers, pre-deregulation, used to issue them from a small metal machine near their cab. 25p would be enough to travel all the way from Speke, on the outskirts of Liverpool where I lived, into the city centre (it now costs £1.50). It would be ten pence for an adult to go one or two stops (it now also costs £1.50 – which is clearly wrong) and five pence for a child.

I remember this so well because on leaving primary school I’d want to rush home in time for The Family Ness or Jimbo & the Jet Set and even though it was only a couple of stops the bus was the quickest route. I’ve shown this to a couple of people today and on both occasions I could see them having similar memories, marveling that such a small piece of ephemera, forgotten in favour of the computerised tickets which came along not long afterwards, could survive across the years. It’s just a flimsy little thing, easily lost in a pocket or bag.

These days, bus companies are rightly or wrongly interested in how many people are traveling on routes and when so that they can adjust their service and also make sure their getting the right amount of money back from their workers, which means printed tickets, large by comparison. In those days, it was simply enough for the council to get you from A to B and make sure there were enough buses to do that sort of thing (even if most of them were falling apart). As with most things in this future of ours, I don’t know that things have actually got better and if you don’t mind me being political in this final sentence, that the companies are more interested in profits rather than actually helping the general public get around town.

TV You might have heard the news today and oh boy it’s good. We (meaning us Doctor Who fans) knew Russell T Davies wouldn’t be around in perpetuity and although Steven Moffat taking his place as show runner and head writer was a possibility, no one was confirming anything and there was always the chance that a bean counter or someone with only a passing interest in the franchise could take over (I even feared it might be Chris Chibnell, the Fred Freiberger of this franchise until he sodded off to run Law & Order: London). That’s exactly the kind of thing that has hurt the show in the past but now we have someone who’s genuinely one of us, someone who even posts regularly to the main Doctor Who discussion board, and more importantly can write (with Bafta and Hugo awards to prove it).

There’s not one thing that Moffat’s written that I haven’t loved. Both of his main sitcoms Joking Apart and Coupling took great pleasure in subverting the format showing that even if you’re studio bound it’s no reason not to deconstruct your storytelling style and editing. In the UK at least I don’t think there’s been anything more innovative than the episode of Coupling in which the same chat up conversation was played from two different language perspectives and funny both ways around. Joking Apart managed to be tragic fantastic mixing elements of farce with a genuinely touching portrayal of a break up. But Jekyll’s recently proved he has the drama chops too but again he turned would could have been a run of the mill, murder of the week premise into something far crazier and intriguing.

His writing of Doctor Who for television also pre-dates Davies in that he scripted the Comic Relief spoof, The Curse of the Fatal Death in the late nineties. For some that was the final nail in the coffin of the franchise, at least on television but for me it was a genuinely affectionate love letter to the series that included plenty of references only us fans would get and in Hugh Grant the best Doctor we never had (and in Richard E Grant the worst Doctor we ended up with during another false dawn). But even if that didn't prove even then that he would be a worthy man to carry the torch, he also managed to name one of the characters in Coupling, Steven Taylor after an early companion from 60s during the Hartnell era.

Every episode he's written for Doctor Who has won or been nominated for the prestigious Nebula award, for a Bafta Craft or Welsh Bafta Award. That's no mean feat, and neither is the fact that Blink has been adjudged the best episode of the last series, even though it's the one that hardly features the main character who's main contribution was via a tv screen, the actor reading his part from an autocue. All of his episodes have been special, from the uplifting ending to the The Empty Child/The Doctor Dances in which the Doctor, still experiencing guilt from the destruction of his guilt finally managed to save the day ("Just this once, Rose, everybody lives!") or The Girl In The Fireplace in which he convincingly showed the Doctor falling in love with a courtesan over forty-five minutes. And all have been properly scary turning gas masks, the tick of a clock and statues into points of fear for children and adults everywhere.

None of which should draw away from what Russell’s achieved with the show. Naysayers with fandom always forget that the series wouldn’t be back and as successful as it is without his interest in it. The oft told story is that the BBC were desperate to have him working for them and when asked what would make him move to the corporation, he said ‘Doctor Who’ and that got the ball rolling. The series might have returned without him, but there can’t have been many others who would be brave enough to see how you could do it as both a re-imagining and a continuation of what’s gone before rather than a simple remake, who would notice that the best fantasy dramas often have a rich pre-existing mythological background. He's also been clever enough to know that you don't mess about with Moffat's scripts and the new showrunner's words are the only ones which Russell doesn't do a final polish on.

It might have seemed left of field for some that the writer of Queer as Folk and The Second Coming would want to try his hand at this, but on reflection he was the perfect man for the job. Without him it's doubtful that we would have had such a solid base in the first season’s lead as Chris Eccleston and the multi-tonal David Tennant following on both showing that the timelord is best portrayed in three dimensions and not the reputed one note character of the past. He somehow also noticed that it is possible to write the series with an eye to both the child and adult audiences, for the most part not alienating either demographics, and also mostly treating them as an intelligent species able to cope with quite complex storytelling imported from film.

He’s been criticised mostly for his writing and although even I can’t deny that just sometimes he lets the excessive parts of his imagination get the better of him, his love for the character and the franchise is always apparent and that he always has their best interests at heart. There’s genuine glee from Russell during some of those dvd and podcast commentaries at the ideas he’s had and the thoughts of the reaction from both the hardcore fanbase and the casuals. Last year’s return of The Master (in the episode Utopia) which managed to draw together seemingly disparate elements from throughout the series, was an amazing piece of structuring which even if you had already had the re-emergence spoiled by a tabloid was still gripping for it's sheer audacity.

So I do hope that Davies stays on-board the Tardis to pen at least one episode a year under Moffat in much the same way that Terrance Dicks kept his toe in when Robert Holmes followed him his job as script editor in the 70s. For my money, his best episodes have been the near stand alones, such as Boomtown which featured a battle between the Doctor and an alien at a dinner table and Tooth & Claw which had Queen Victoria fighting a werewolf. Both of those were apparently written in a hurry but perhaps without the mechanics of a whole season to worry about he’d be happy just to have to keep an eye on successive drafts of the one story rather than trying to deliver two or three interconnected episodes in time for the close of seasons. There’s more Doctor Who as well as other things in that imagination of his and I for one can’t wait to see if and what he writes next.

Music Glutton for punishment I’m ‘enjoying’ the full Eurovision experience this year, tuning in for both semi-finals ahead of Saturday. Tonight’s show was about as disappointing as I expected with retina splitting production values, a steady stream of average ballads and novelty records but with the odd moment of genuine goodness. The Belgium entry, decked in a dress borrowed from Strawberry Switchblade, took the Sigur Ros approach of making up her own language and I think if she hadn’t been called Ishtar with all the jinxiness that name attracts she might have gone through.

Finland’s Teräsbetoni scored because they’re from a genre totally unlike anything else there and Kalomira from Greece was essentially British weather girl Laura Tobin pretending to be Britney Spears. But my favourite and the only genuinely good song came from Norway’s Maria Haukaas Storeng, a Jewel Kilcher lookalike sounding like Christina Aguilera when she’s not doing interesting things with oils. She once played Ophelia at the theatre with adds a few points, but the song was about something and had a beginning middle and end and at least she's not a turkey (Dustin’s only admirable quality was actually mentioning Terry Wogan in a Eurovision song, not that it did it much good. That’s comedy in Ireland? Yeah, err, grand).

Journalism The Telegraph post Guardian interview about their My Telegraph service before The Guardian does. Hilarity ensues:

"Q. For example, we've found instances of BNP campaign literature being published on the site. What is your policy towards this? Will it be any different after the relaunch?
A. There is also content from Conservative councillors and party members as well as from Labour activists, Ukip supporters and independents. We don't endorse content posted by BNP supporters but we accept that they are a legal political party and they have the same right to free speech as anyone else. However, readers can report content that concerns them and we will examine it and take action based on our assessment.
The comments which follow are about what you'd expect, somewhat underscoring all of the prejudices highlighted in The Guardian's questions. I'm quite happy being a liberal, thanks, if that means I think racism, bigotry and sexism are bad things.

Three days later, The Guardian's posted the article in question, referring to that Telegraph post mid-stream (though oddly not linking to it) and offering a very balanced discussion of the responsibility websites must have over the content they host, especially if it is user generated. Here's my slightly less balanced view, from when My Telegraph launched.

“I’d best go and tell the curator what I’ve done.”

Art Marshall Claxton’s painting The Lifeboat offers an exciting image of a group of people clinging desperately to the mast of a ship which has sunk. Their anguished eyes wonder if they’ll ever be saved. A woman prays. Another is attempting to save her child as he sinks below the waves. A man hands an infant up to the waiting arms of its mother. In the distance (as you might expect from the title) hope is at hand in the form of a lifeboat, paddling through the rain in a desperate fight to get the group before they’re taken by the sea forever. It’s exciting and action packed and startling and then you discover that the artist is reputed to have been witness to the scene as he travelled back from Australia having set up an art school there. This is from life.

Rossendale Museum in Rawtenstall is rightly very proud of this painting (which has recently spent a couple of years on loan to a gallery in Oz) – it’s the highlight of a small but rather wonderful assortment which deserves more attention that it probably receives. Edward Morris’s Public Art Collections in North-West England devotes a single page to the place but that’s understandable given the paintings are but one aspect of a general museum collection which also includes a natural history display and thorough exhibition about the area. Opened in 1902 in Oak Hill, the former residence of mill owner George Hardman, it’s how Sudley House might have turned out if they’d also had to find room for the collection of World Museum Liverpool too.

As I strolled up the hill towards the museum from Rawtenstall I was slowly gaining the impression that it might not be open. It wasn’t. Although two locals sat in a bench in the grounds looking out towards the Lancashire countryside which is beautiful and visible from up there, all of the lights were off and oddly some construction tape had been wound around the fence posts on either side of the front door. I walked to the side of the house anyway and tried pushing the disabled entrance door open but it didn’t budge. I thought for a moment, sighed and knocked on the door.

No answer. I noticed a bell. I rang it. Still nothing. Deciding that at least I could say I’d been, I began to walk away, but then heard noises from inside and moments the later the door opened. A man stood looking at me. I asked him if they were closed and he told me they were closed all of Monday and Friday for maintenance. I tried my luck and told him I’d travelled all the way from Liverpool to see the museum. “Well,” he said, “You’d better come in then.” And basically opened up the venue just for me, switching on all the lights and explaining to me where everything was kept. I felt very honoured by that and grateful and tried not to take up too much of his time.

“I’d best go and tell the curator what I’ve done.” He said.

The fine art settles in two rooms on the ground floor and the hallway. The drawing room recreates the style and furnishings of the 1880s like a concentrated Dunham Massey, though its not an accurate representation of what would have been their originally – there’s no surviving photographic evidence of that. It’s a lush, opulent space where the labeling highlights the furniture but doesn’t mention the rather nice portrait on the wall opposite the fireplace. This woman with silky smooth skin in crimson drapery reclining with a sword is something of a mystery – the attendant says their not sure of its origins but there must be some story behind those eyes. You’d like to think that she’s had some previous connection to the house, perhaps an obscured clue to one of its secrets.

The Lifeboat is in the fine and decorative arts room next door. Presumably because the display apparently changes periodically the guidebook is more interested in the wall paper, but you’re more likely to find yourself standing opposite Pamela, a girl depicted in a full length portrait. The sub-heading for John Collier’s painting is Stepping Stones and my impression is that the stones she stands upon symbolically representing those tentative steps into adulthood. She looks like a younger version of actress Heather Graham, a not yet society deb dressed in nothing but a white dress within a wood. It’s probably as unproblematic as Collier gets and has a far more innocent atmosphere in comparison to the likes of Lilith which scorches up the main gallery space at the Atkinson Gallery in Southport. I’d be intrigued to know who this Pamela is – none of the biographies I can find online mention her or this painting for that matter, even though it was donated by the artist’s wife.

I ended my look at the fine art collection at the Devil’s Bridge on the St Gothard Pass, Thomas Creswick’s untypical landscape in which a wooden bridge is mercilessly wrecked by a violent torrent of water gushing down a mountain. Dark satanic hills overlook a scene in which what remains of humanity’s stamp on the landscape is washed away, wooden logs strewn and broken against rocks. As Edward notes: ‘There’s no room for man’ and you genuinely hope that someone wasn’t crossing the bridge just before Atlantic rocked. As global tragedies in recent weeks in China and Burma demonstrate we might think that were in control of our own destiny, but nature has other ideas.

Elsewhere Ripping. Toppo. Supar.

Film Trailer for Woody's next film (or next film but two if you're in the UK) Vicky Cristina Barcelona. My brain just exploded. You'll see why.

TV Woman sat dead in front of TV for 42 years: "The cup she had been drinking tea from was still on a table next to the chair she had been sitting in and the house was full of things no one had seen for decades. Nothing had been disturbed for decades, even though there were more than a few cobwebs in there." [via]

Comics 5 Superhero Movie Scenes They'll Never Let You See: "Rather than drown his sorrows in alcohol (like Iron Man) or an endless supply of nubile tail (like Wolverine), Pym (Ant Man) dealt with his self-esteem problems in the least superheroic way possible: he beat his wife."

Life In case you hadn't noticed with all the writing I've been on holiday this past couple of days. Today I went on yet another of those gallery trips, the location for which will be revealed at some later date, just to keep you in suspense (it's related to a milk commercial, that's all I'm saying) When I decided to visit all of these galleries, I just thought it would be a leisurely chance to visit some places I haven't been before and see some good paintings in the process. After Monday and today I'm beginning to see that actually this is turning into something akin to one of Dave Gorman or Danny Wallace's eccentric bets except that (a) there was no bet and (b) I'm not trying to prove anything to anyone. I'll tell you about my thrilling adventures in Lancashire when I'm a bit more awake.

“Ideas of time and space were changed forever.” -- Wall label

Art Art In The Age of Steam is one of the Walker Art Gallery Liverpool’s tentpole major exhibitions as part of the Capital of Culture celebrations. As such then it should be rather special and you know what – it really is – one of the best exhibitions the galleries has staged this decade. It’s an interesting and relevant topic and the exhibition takes time to look at the very specific era between 1830 and the early half of the 1900s in great detail, showing how different artists working various genres and media reacted to it.

As the opening explanation in the wall notes, “Ideas of time and space were changed forever.” Stream engines meant that people could travel faster than ever before between destinations which utterly changed perceptions of the local world. It’s difficult for us now to imagine a world in which it would take days or weeks to travel throughout even our small island, London seeming a very long way away rather than two and half hours (give or take delays). Also, it’s not emphasised enough in the show but the Liverpool to Manchester steam railway was one of the technical marvels of its age with Stevenson’s Rocket the famous vehicle that ran first on the tracks.

Fittingly, it’s the flexibility of travel in the times we live that allow this exhibition to be quite as comprehensive and surprising. There’s no denying that it’s quite thrilling to enter a section, for example ‘Impressionism and Post-Impressionism’ and find five Monet and a Manet lined up on a wall opposite some Pisarros and a Van Gogh in a space, a ten minute bus ride away from. That might be commonplace in London and Paris obviously, but certainly not in Liverpool and many of these are from private collections and this will be the only time they can be seen for many a year. It might sound trite to talk about names over the quality of the work on display, but this is the first time I’ve actually stood close enough to an Edward Hopper to see the brush strokes and that’s not something you’d really want to forget.

As a side note, having worked for the registrars of a gallery I can understand the undertaking this exhibition will have represented, especially considering the number of institutions which are listed as sources, many of them in the US. Plus there’s the funding. Monet’s Railway Bridge, Argenteuil actually has an addition to its label that the ‘transportation was supported by Merseytravel’ which means that the cost of moving that one painting was so expensive an outside organisation had to step in!

Some of these provenance labels are interesting in and of themselves. Norbet Guenuette's View of Saint-Lazare Railway, Paris is owned by The Baltimore Museum of Art but many hands chipped in to buy it for their collection; 'The George A Lucas Collection purchased with funds from the State of Maryland, Laurence and Stella Bendann Fund, and contributions from individuals, foundations and corporations throughout the Baltimore community.' That's what I call civic pride.

If the Impressionists stands out for its A-List power, the emotional backbone is the section about 'the human drama of the railway'. Spend enough time between trains, idly waiting for the next train and you’ll find yourself people watching, speculating on who your fellow passengers are and how they spend the rest of their lives. Sometimes, if you’ve been commuting together you might ask and sometimes their story might even be more fantastic than you first thought. But often you’re happy with the fantasy, and these pictures of travellers on station platforms and in train carriages capture that impulse perfectly, period scenes teaming with life, small groups of people demanding us to imagine their story.

The area is dominated by WP Frith’s The Railway Station which like all of them contrasts the different classes of passenger showing how segregation was still in effect even as they joined the train. It’s Parting Words, Fenchurch Street Station by Frederick Brown Barwell that creates the biggest mystery because it seems to be based on some lost novel. As the label asks, just “Why is the man on the left standing in amazement at one of the two identically dressed ladies?” That seems to be a theme, since across the room Augustus Egg’s The Travelling Companions also features two similarly costumed girls, twins in fact, sitting opposite one another in a carriage producing a near symmetrical image but for the scenery.

The American vistas in 'Crossing continents - America and beyond' are of the order which must have influenced John Ford and his cinematographers as they attempted to capture the old west on film. Often, as in George Inness’s The Lackawanna Valley there’s a stark contrast between the idyllic countryside and this symbol of industrialisation rolling through. But its difficult not be moved by the massive canvas of Donner Lake from the Summit by Albert Biersladt in which the train is dwarfed by the landscape, suggesting that no matter what happens, nature will out.

The final two areas 'States of Mind' and 'The Machine Age' bespeak of the transitional period when Steam was inevitably superseded by even more impressive, but perhaps more damaging technology. Whilst its interesting to watch the avant-guard attempt to deal with old technology in a new era, the most effective image here are the still green and red hues of Hopper’s Railroad Sunset which shows a solitary signaling box and now trains, perhaps underscoring what’s been lost. A plasma screen in the gallery has footage from a range of films showing these beasts in action and it’s certainly a more thrilling experience than watching an anonymous two carriage electric box trundle out of Lime Street.

Film A couple of years ago there was a screening in Manchester of Mitchell & Kenyon’s football films. M&K were two Blackburn entrepreneurs who for a period in the early part of the last century set about filming people and work and play and then charging them to see their life projected that evening at various locations including fair grounds and libraries and it turned out St George’s Hall. I’ve thought since then how wonderful it would be to organise such a showing at that venue again and last night I got to see what that looked like as hundreds of people piled into the main hall to see a selection of their films of Liverpool, in a screening organised by the BFI and Liverpool University.

My version of the event was a plasma tv running from a Matsui dvd player with about thirty chairs. Instead, the main stage was filled with a giant screen, showing images from a state of the art projector sat on the organ balcony and an audience covering the whole floor. The programme selected highlights from over two hours of footage shot in the city, generally places with large gatherings of people such ass football matches, parades, the return of soldiers from the Boer War, the leaving of Cunard ships from the Pier Head and oddly a reconstruction of the arrest of a criminal.

As you can see from these edited highlights, that’s a very broad description of the marvels we saw, blurry scenes of the past put into context by the guest speakers, Julia Hallam from Liverpool University and Vanessa Toulmin from Sheffield’s National Fairground Archive, who’d also commentated on the football in Manchester and has apparently presented over a hundred and thirty similar shows throughout the country. Vanessa seems tireless and has the same enthusiasm for the subject that I saw two years ago.

I went with my Dad and he was particularly impressed with the musical accompaniment provided by Stephen Horne, who at one point played the flute and piano simultaneously creating a spooky atmosphere to accompany the recreated Arrest of Goudie (a film which demonstrates exactly how difficult it was to spin a narrative when you’ve only very long static shots to work with, establishing shots lasting many minutes). Now and then Horne imported familiar melodies including You’ll Never Walk Alone and The Leaving of Liverpool, which created some wonderfully post-modern moments, different eras of the past combining.

Seeing images such as the giving of medals to soldiers even I can’t but feel that we’ve lost something in our stupid cynical world. True, some of the audience in the footage of the May Day Demonstrations look bored stiff (with the exception of one particularly enthusiastic gentleman waving his hat in the air) but it was at least a regular gathering in which the entire community could become involved and which by the looks of things hadn’t been hijacked by commercial concerns (with the exception of the ice cream man perhaps).

The Capital of Culture year, with collective experiences such as this screening are proving that actually such things are still possible. Usually in screenings I’m quite obsessed about talkers making noise during the main feature. Here it seemed positively encouraged, a collective brains trust attempting to work out exactly were in Liverpool particular films had been shot, or exclamations of surprise as the older demographic of the audience saw shops and streets that have long disappeared.

TV Heather writes about being interviewed by Kathie Lee Gifford on NBC's Today Show, which sounds even worse than BBC Breakfast in dealing with left of field (ie, not mainstream) topics:

"this is obviously a case of an interviewer not being adequately familiar with the topic at hand (also, probably not a good idea to have someone afraid of computers interviewing someone about their job using computers). And I'm not about to jump into the crowd and start calling Kathie Lee names, she does not deserve that from me. I'm not so much angry at her as I am disappointed that this topic was not given the service it deserves."
I've not seen anything but the opening of video because of my chuggy connection, but really? That's how you're introducing a section about something computer related? 'I hate computers!' That sounds like it's going to be an in-depth interview ...

"Journalism" Just because they need to be told over and over and often. No Daily Mail, it isn't cool to steal photos from flickr without attribution and for commercial gain if the photographer says it isn't.

Law So after October 1 when judges are hearing civil and family cases in England and Wales, they'll be dressed like The Ood from Doctor Who with fashion pretensions?

Updated three minutes later: I just want it on record that I read what Hadley Freeman said in The Guardian three minutes after I posted the above. She said: "If humanising the judicial profession was the aim of this makeover, it is interesting that Betty Jackson decided that the outfit best suited for this would be one that looks like something an alien android with menacing religious undertones would wear when waging war with Doctor Who." I let you decide which is funnier. It's hers right?

Education Annette writes inspiringly about being a teacher: "But then, just when you want to give up, something amazing happens. You're reading a student's essay, and it's so much better than the first draft. He read my comments! You read on--wow, this kid's got good ideas! He cited his sources correctly. Some of the comma errors are still there, but they're not too bad. This kid, the kid who sits in the back texting while you're lecturing, the kid who you thought never paid attention, this kid can write a college paper! *Choirs of angels sing hallelujah* It worked! I "taught" them something! As a teacher you live for those moments. As satisfying moments go, those rank right up there."

"You don't know much, do you?" -- Another visitor who thought I was a staff member and harranged me with a barrage of questions.

Art I was told off by one of the attendants when I described Dunham Massey Hall as a stately home. “Not so stately” she whispered to me mischievously. I’m still not sure how else to describe it, given that it’s a rather large house in the middle of an estate. The National Trust website calls it mansion so we'll go with that. Of all the venues I've visited from Edward Morris’s Public Art Collections In North-West England book, it’s the first so-far that I’ve actually wanted to live in, with room after room filled with gorgeous furniture and a genuine sense of lost time. Except I’m not sure where I’d put the telly and there doesn’t seem to be anywhere to plug in a computer.

The mansion was built in 1616 by Sir George Booth, one of James I’s baronettes and across the years has been occupied by various Lords and Earls of Stamford and Warrington before falling into the hands of the National Trust on the death of the 10th Earl Roger Grey in 1976. Since then the house has hardly been changed which means that as you stroll past wood paneling and wallpaper, across wooden floors and worn carpets you can see the modification and developments added by many of owners, all attempting to make it their home.

In many cases the original furniture was kept in state and later generations have simply filled other rooms with their life with areas such as The Great Hall, the Library and the Billiard Room all seeming like separate time zones, the visitor stepping through portals between. At first it’s quite disorientating and there’s certainly too much for the eye to take in, every detail suggesting the tastes and decency of the people who lived here. It’s probably best to concentrate on a particular aspect and focus, which is why it’s helpful that I particular wanted to see the fine art collection.

To an extent it’s a building-shaped family album, with every wall featuring at least one portrait of somebody or other. With the exception of the Romney and the Reynolds, most of these are head and shoulders 'shots' and actually a bit samey and of the kind which would be dashed off quickly by a painter living off the commissions. Since we are seeing generations of the same family though, you can see how painting methods have developed over the centuries, techniques becoming more sophisticated with the passage of time, from rather sombre ladies in black from the Jacobian era to the bright face of the turn of the last century.

You’ll need a good pair of binoculars though, since the best of these portraits tend to be at the opposite ends of large rooms, a frustration of stately homes were security is paramount. There’s an amazing picture of Dorothy Wrighte, the wife of the 3rd Earl of Stamford attributed to Jon Richardson in the Dining Room, with vivid reds in her dress but you can only see it from a small mezzanine leading in from the Stone Parlour. Similarly you need some determination to have decent look at the canvas that dominates the summer parlour, a full length by J. Ernest Breum of Penelope Theobald, Countess of Stamford and her children.

In general though, I think the finest pictures are fairly unheralded and you’d miss most of them if you weren’t looking. On ducking into the entrance hall, the staff are determined to herald you on, but I managed to stop in the doorway of the adjoining courtyard and noticed on either side two paintings by J Boultbee, Denham Oak. These appear to be mirror images of each other, broken trees moodily gathered in dark wood. Look more closely and you’ll notice that actually the artist has painted the same scene from two different directions and if you were to lean the two canvases back to back, you’d have a three hundred and sixty degree view within a two dimensional plain. A.L.R. Ducros’s Temple of Minerva Medici, Rome uses much the same trick showing a ruined dome within a landscape from opposite angles as nature in the form of vines and trees claims this ancient architecture for its own.

Roped off nearby in the parlour you can just about glimpse J Nelson Drummond’s Where Heroes Rest, a poignantly misty view of St. Paul’s Cathedral created in coloured crayon, greens and blues blended to underscore the sense of doom in the title. Along the corridors, don’t miss Le Champ Du Drop D’or, a 1774 engraving at the bottom of a stairwell showing the procession of Henry VIII to meet the French King Francis I, which as well as featuring some wonderfully Hogarthian characterisation amongst hundreds of faces has a dragon, yes, a dragon flying through the sky, something Shakespeare omitted when he got around to writing the King’s stage biography. Further into the house, the weirdest picture by far is the one Edward highlights in his book by Jan Wyck of A Dutch Mastiff with Dunham Massey in the Background. He calls it ‘sensitive and touching’ but it's also scary, a kind of forced perspective suggesting that the dog’s grown to Digby proportions and is preparing to stamp all over the town which also lies in the background, giant paw prints in its wake.

Most of these curiosities aren’t even mentioned in their guide book, which prefers to spend much of its time detailing the silver, jewelery and furniture, the history of the house and its gardens. It does take time though to include John Harris’s birds-eye views of the hall painted in 1751. Predating the game show Treasure Hunt and Google Earth by around two hundred and fifty years these are fascinating descriptions of the grounds of the house and how the 2nd Earl of Warrington very much saw them as an extension of the property, avenues fanning out into his plantations. I presume they’re extrapolations of the plans, that century’s equivalent of the artist impression as seen whenever a new building project is being proposed (see the soon to be opened Liverpool One).

This one of the most idyll places I’ve ever visited. In the gardens alone, despite having spent most of life near Sefton Park I still wasn’t prepared for the freshness of the air and fragrances, the colours and the silences. Or the wildlife; deer walk freely around the estate and I couldn’t help pointing and exclaiming ‘It’s a deer!’ to the staff member I’d luckily got off the bus with and was showing me the way to the house. Ironically, even if much of the collection is slightly obscured from view, it’s relatively expensive to get in and it wasn’t the easiest venue to reach (it took three and a half hours to get home) I think this might well come close to being my favourite of these visits, if only because it far exceeded my expectations.

TV That's hilarious. It's ages since I've had a text message that exciting. From the comments: "Apparently, he's been pacing the corridor saying "It's not what it looks like"

(yes, I know that's not much to go on but you'll just have to click and have look -- the last thing we need is for Google's algorithm to latch onto the names -- it'd be in the tabloids by the end of the week which wouldn't be fair)

TV If anyone still needs to be convinced that Doctor Who is real television, Steven Moffat has won Best Writer at the Bafta Craft Awards for arguably the best episode of last year's series Blink. Which sounds quite impressive, and then you find out that he beat Jimmy McGovern (for "The Street"), Tony Marchant (for "The Mark of Cain") and Heidi Thomas (for "Cranford"). Extraordinary.

Commerce EBay is broken: "So I returned to the list of items, and found that - sure enough - the 6th page which I had expected to find my item on was actually only the sixth page of featured items. It was not for another several pages that the list of featured items was finally exhausted, and the 'Time Left' column reset from '5 days' to '< 1 minute'. Once again I had to click through several pages of items which were ending before mine, until finally, around page 20, I saw my item in the queue. Great, I thought, what good is an auction if nobody sees it?" Later.

Music Why I don't go to gigs -- and in fact why I don't go to gigs: "People who take pictures throughout gigs. Several flavours of these, now; the professional photographer who elbows his way to the front on the grounds that he has a job to do, clicks away with little regard for the people behind or destruction of atmosphere. The mobile phone fan who you would assume had done this enough times to realise you will never, ever get a decent photograph of a band from the back of a hall, particularly by waving your shitty handset in the air, but still tries periodically."

Music When does it stop being Kraftwerk? "I happily accept that when they play 'The Robots' as an encore, with nothing on stage except 4 laptops and 4 mechanical robots, that I am watching Kraftwerk."

Elsewhere In case you're wondering, I actually did have a shower.

Music Two Scottish lads pretended to be American rappers for two years in order to get a record deal, signed with Sony, and then realised that if they ever released a single they'd be found out:: "If you can convince one person, and then another person, eventually you have all these people believing in you, wanting something from you." As their social circle in London expanded, they would appropriate plot lines from TV shows and films, or stories they'd heard Americans tell, to flesh out their new identities. "We'd play around with different accents - we'd go, 'Fark off' and do loads of English accents, fooling around - and people were like, 'You should have your own TV show!' We did Billy Connolly and people were clean blown away by Americans doing such good Scottish accents."

Music Useful column from Charles Arthur describing how the internet blindsided record companies:

"As they explain, the average CD is 650 megabytes of high-quality sound. Every single second takes up 1.4 megabits of data. But everywhere you look, your potential consumers - home internet users, the same people who buy CDs now - are on dialup internet, chugging along at 36 kilobits per second. At that speed, it would take 45 hours to download a CD. In that time, you could walk to the nearest store and buy the record."
Except, as we know, someone was already thinking ahead.

Comics I'll write about my new DC Comics obsession some other time (isn't Identity Crisis great? Isn't it though?) but for now here's a useful article about retconing and the headaches thereof, inspired by the increasingly bizarre Spiderman incident but take in the sights throughout the con-iverse including The Legion of Superheroes:

I've been pulling from Legion history for a lot of this, because... well, because they're kind of the perfect example. Moving from the Levitz version of the classic Legion to the Giffen/Bierbaum version of the retconned Legion and then the Post-Zero Hour Rebooted Legion gave us a chance to see almost all of these retcons in practice, and in the long run they were almost all disastrous.
I thought the Whoniverse was inconsistent until I saw what had been going on with DC for decades. How can fans keep up with their favourite characters when their origin stories and status quo keep changing every three or four years?

"Journalism" Typical bloody Daily sodding Mail. I mean it's not like there aren't enough of the real thing, as The Observer found out when they posted a typically well researched story on the subject over a week before the mid-market tossers. That is all.

Poetry Alicia Goranson (one of the Beckys from the sitcom Rosanne) hasn't posted to her blog since 2006 but has just these past few weeks begun posting some poetry. Taking into account that like most people, everything I know about verse (that isn't by one man and written four hundred years ago) I learned at school before failing A-level English, it's actually very good. So good in fact it's put me in the mood to inflict some of my own on you, from back in the day -- 13th March 1996 -- to be exact.

"Something New

He reached out
to touch her,
nervously.

Away, she
pulled, from him,
shielding.

He spoke to
her calmly.

Screaming, her
voice cracked.

He smiled.

She shouted.

He ...

She ...

She reaches out
to touch him,
nervously.

He holds out
his hand and
grips hers.

She speaks to
him calmly.

Laughing, his
voice cracks.

She smiles.

He weeps.

She ...

He ....
See. What do I know about poetry? I really need a muse. You do know what the promised BIG REVELATION was during the tail end of Mystery Music don't you?

"I haven't ever really found a place to call home ..." -- Dido, 'Life For Rent'

About In the comments to the Dido post, Matthew wondered where the lyrics "The implication I mistook, told on whose side you took; and now with paper in my hand, I'm beginning to understand..." are from. I can say with some confidence (admittedly after a hunt round Google), they're from The Housemartins's track Freedom and should read:

"But the implications I mistook
Until I found out whose side you took
And now with paper in my hand I'm beginning to understand "

I'm listening to the song as I type from their compilation, Now That's What I Call Quite Good. They're right. I can't quite believe how good The Housemartins were and unlike some bands I can mention, they knew when to call it a day (after just five years) before their talent turned to mush in the face of success. There is not a single poor song on this album and despite the vintage, the mid-80s, doesn't sound at all dated largely because they didn't give in to voguish temptation to include any of the electric noises which were in vogue at the time even on ostensibly acoustic albums.

Lead singer Paul Heaton's later band was of course The Beautiful South and one of their lost classics is a cover version of Dream A Little Dream which appears on the soundtrack to French Kiss (the Meg Ryan/Kevin Kline rom-com). It's on there twice in English and French and I can't help but prefer the latter simply it's so unusual to hear the style of the group with a vocal in a different language.

Incidentally, Amazon are listing a new Dido release for September called TBA. It looks like a single judging by the price -- unless they're so worried about sales that they're discounting an album even before it's released. Which is unlikely.

"You were so cruel and I hated being your fool..." -- Patty Griffin, 'Time Will Do The Talking'

Communication Finally had a chance to use Facebook's new chat service last night. It was only a quick try-out -- I wanted to ask Chris something about someone, he happened to be online and the question was answered very quickly. And that's the point -- it was fast -- simply look at the list of friends who might by using the site at that moment, click the icon and initiate. No messing about with Trillian or any of the chat software, no needing to know someone's user id or ICQ number. The name is simply there, a button press away.

I'm impressed.

I haven't used chat software in years, largely because I tend to like to write in sentences which isn't very conducive to chat. All too often someone would butt in mid sentence to ask if I was still there. But on this basis of this I'm thinking of trying again.

Of course, tonight, when I'm in the mood, "No one is available to chat."

Typical.

Architecture I09 offers some 1970s Soviet architecture which doesn't look like a product of this earth and could pass quite comfortably in the sci-fi franchise universe of your choice: "French photojournalist Frederic Chaubin likes to take photographs of science-fictiony Soviet architecture from the 1970s and 80s. During that era, the Soviets erected several formidable buildings that look like cities you'd see on an alien world. Pictured here is a strangely organic-looking wedding palace which is located in Georgia. More U.S.S.R. spaceportecture below."

Plug! A rep who I think works for one of my haunts, Tate Liverpool, has asked me to plug this excellent new scheme, and the best way to do that is probably to offer the entire press release. So if you'll indulge me and in a break from tradition:

7 May 2008

YOU’RE HIRED: LIVERPOOL’S APPRENTICE PROGRAMME HELPS YOUNG PEOPLE GET INTO THE CREATIVE AND CULTURAL INDUSTRIES

A consortium of Liverpool’s leading cultural organisations – led by Tate Liverpool - is set to launch a unique national training scheme this May. Creative Apprenticeships Liverpool has been devised for young people aged 16-24. It’s part of the national Creative Apprenticeships scheme devised by Creative & Cultural Skills and will pave the way for thousands of young people to access previously out-of-reach careers within the creative and cultural industries.

Competition for jobs within the cultural sector is fierce. Often, entry-level jobs are awarded to graduates who already have significant work experience under their belts. This means that young people who may have the right talent and aptitude, but don’t have the qualifications or work experience, are unable to compete. The end result is a workforce that isn’t diverse and that doesn’t reflect the local communities it serves.

To tackle this, eight major arts organisations, known collectively as Liverpool Arts & Regeneration Consortium (LARC), together with Liverpool Community College, have been involved in the development of Creative Apprenticeships Liverpool and will be piloting the programme in the city during 2008.

In September, ten young people from Merseyside will become the first Creative Apprentices in the region. They’ll receive paid, on-the-job training while working inside some of Liverpool’s most successful arts organisations, from Tate Liverpool to the newly reopened Bluecoat. As well as walking away with a formal qualification at the end of the 12-month programme (a Level 2 NVQ in Community Arts Management), participants will gain invaluable work experience, career counselling and transferable skills.

Importantly, Creative Apprenticeships Liverpool will ensure that local young people get the skills they need to take advantage of the boom in cultural jobs in their home city.

The development of this ambitious programme was initiated by Tate and independent grant-making body, the Paul Hamlyn Foundation. Taking a long-term view, the Foundation invested £155,000 in the Liverpool pilot, funding not only initial research and development but also ‘capacity building’ within the Liverpool-based arts organisations taking part.

The programme’s early research identified that Liverpool’s cultural organisations were more used to managing experienced graduates than young people fresh from school, leaving them ill equipped to support young employees. A major part of the programme has therefore focused on changing the employment culture within participating organisations, with staff receiving formal and informal training to give them the skills necessary to support younger colleagues. National Museums Liverpool has delivered this part of the programme, which represents a major step towards creating a more diverse workforce within Liverpool’s growing creative and cultural sector.

‘The Paul Hamlyn Foundation welcomes the launch of Creative Apprenticeships Liverpool,’ says Robert Dufton, Director of the Paul Hamlyn Foundation. ‘We see this as a national pilot for cultural organisations across the UK, enabling them to use their resources so that young people in their communities develop skills which will equip them for working both in the creative industries and other sectors. In particular, this scheme has the potential to contribute to the development of the workforce for the 2012 Olympics. The Foundation initiated this scheme with Tate Liverpool and has contributed towards its development and implementation. The Foundation is committed to maximising opportunities for individuals and communities to realise their potential and experience and enjoy a better quality of life.’

‘This scheme shows both the strengths of Liverpool’s cultural sector and investors’ confidence in it,’ said Andrea Nixon, Executive Director of Tate Liverpool. ‘We were extremely fortunate to have had a partner such as the Paul Hamlyn Foundation involved from the start. The Foundation understood our vision for the Apprenticeships, believed that we could change the culture of employment within the sector and had complete confidence in the ability of the city’s cultural organisations to work together to make Creative Apprenticeships Liverpool a reality.’

Creative Apprenticeships Liverpool launches at Tate Liverpool on 13 May – with the consortium behind it looking to sign up its first intake of ten apprentices by 13 June. The Apprenticeships themselves will kick off in September 2008 and will run for 12 months.

Open events will be held at: Tate Liverpool (13 May, 6pm-8pm), FACT (18 May, 1pm-4pm) and National Museums Liverpool (29 May, 2pm-4pm). Applicants can also find out more at www.creativeapprenticeshipsliverpool.org.uk.

"Warrington is where it all began. I was at the grand opening of Allied Carpets in the late 80s and Leslie Crowther shook my hand." - Justin Moorhouse

Art A couple of weeks ago on a wet Tuesday, I visited Warrington Museum and Art Gallery. It wasn’t the first time I’ve been through the doors. It’s one of the few places in Edward Morris’s Public Art Collections in North-West England guide I’ve been reluctant to travel to because I’ve been through its doors before and I’ve been trying to enjoy the shock of the new as much as possible. I dropped in many times during the late nineties when I was working for Edward researching local public art (for the Public Monuments and Sculpture Association) in the adjoining library. It was a good place to get some cheap machine coffee if I needed to take a break from looking through the records.

The coffee hasn’t changed much and neither has the museum. Founded in 1848 and opened five years later by the local Town Council, it’s as much a piece of history as the objects in its care. Wood paneling and old style cabinets dominate, with hand written information cards next to the artifacts. In an age when museums are being refit left and centre attempting to get away from the culture of simply showing a myriad ethnographic examples, it’s quite surprising to find a place standing still, maintaining its traditional style, a perfect way for curatorial students to see what the museums of yesteryear were like. Please don’t see that as a criticism; one of the best rooms at the British Museum is the antiquated Enlightenment which offers the chance for the visitor to discover the marvelous without them being highlighted to readily. Warrington offers that journey across an entire collection.

The art gallery extension was built in 1875 to ’77 essentially, according to Edward, to house a single sculpture – John Warrington Wood’s milk white marble St Michael Overcoming Satan, which can be seen just inside the front door. Wood was a Warrington boy, and though he spent his formative working years in Rome it's just right that his labour should be represented. There’s no entrance hall as such or at all in fact. A stairwell essentially, with a lift at the centre. But the thing you really notice is how acoustically distracting the building is. I could hear the staff chatting loudly two floors up and a visiting school group trudging about, which isn’t exactly conducive to looking at art. Deep breath. Sigh.

There are three particular display sections. This section of the building has been refit slight since I last visited, the temporary exhibition space slightly more ‘modern’ than before and the mezzanine floor above more prominent to the eye. Warrington’s School of Art was one of the best in the country and its most successful period was in the 1860s under brilliantly named headmaster J. Christmas Thompson. It’s this work which is collected up there and you can see why the students achieved more scholarships than most other art schools of the time.

Henry Woods's First Communion Vale is a Technicolor feast capturing a Mediterranean view of two girls chatting whilst one sews the titular garment. It’s a pleasingly odd composition – the faces aren’t entire realistic and the background is positively impressionistic. Also worth spending time with is a sculpture, Guinevere’s Redeeming by William Reynolds Stephens lustrously developed in bronze, ivory and enamel. It wonders if Arthur’s queen did indeed bring down Camelot and she’s seen trying to make amends for her deeds by returning Excalibur to its rightful owner.

The most interesting pictures on the floor are from Thomas Birtles, some photographs of old Warrington. There’s the Manchester Ship Canal under construction and more atmospherically Eagle and Child Yard, Formerly Patten’s Lane, Looking East to Bridge Street. This isn't mere reportage. It’s a view from a dusty yard into the world beyond, teasing the viewer with a slight image of women in the fashions of the time and the world of the past beyond. If anything it reminds me of Nicholas Middleton’s John Moores entry from 2006, Scene From a Contemporary Novel which showed a similarly ugly part of the city invigorated by the some striking lighting.

There’s no delicate way of saying the following so I’ll just blurt it out. The rest of the fine art collection is maddeningly displayed in the stairwell and particularly the one you’re greeted by at the entrance. A recent re-hang also meant that none of them were labeled and so my ability to offer a commentary is pretty foggy. There’s a nicely turned out painting of a girl popping some peas in a pink top but I couldn’t tell you who it’s by. I also liked the Daughter of the Lagoons by Luke Filder enough to write the title down, but I think by this stage in the visit, the background noise from everywhere had become so intense there wasn’t much I could do. Once everything's sorted out in a couple of weeks I'm sure this will be fine.

Luckily though, and to end on a positive note, I think I’d already seen the best paintings before stepping onto the mezzanine. Walter Langley’s Between the Tides shows a woman leaning over a rail to talk to a rather stereotypical looking fisherman at some docks which is ironic because you also have to lean over a rail to see it. Above the stairs is Fair Quiet and Sweet Rest by Sir Luke Fildes, an idyllic scene of what looks like two couples rowing slowly across a river, singing and taking in the swans and lilly pads – that I can describe the speed they travelling